We never landed on the moon.

Well, actually, we did, but "Capricorn One" scenarios are more fun than just landing on some space rock.

But no, really, we didn't land on the moon. Why?

Lizard People.

Yep, there's lizard people on the moon... fornicating and stuff. (I'm serious, man! Some guy wrote a book on it!)

So they fake the moon landings so people wouldn't think they're there. Creepy, man.

But why are they there? Only I know the truth...


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No! Not moon cheese. Think I'm retarded or something.

Cows, dude. The lizard people are hording our cheese from cow's milk. Why do you think there's been all these outcrops of "Mad Cow" disease. It's their way of getting those cows out of the system and transporting them to moon.

...to have their cheese.

Why do you think McDonalds is so big? The government's filled with slimy lizard people helping McDonalds funnel cows from our planet to the lizard people.

But why cheese? What is so special about cheese? That's the dark secret the lizard people don't want you to know.

And that's why we're in Iraq today.

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This website was posted on 2/10/05